i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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