You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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