I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
