If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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