So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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