ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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