you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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