My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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