I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize