I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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