Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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