You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
