Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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