yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Send us your Text From Last Night!
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.