So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
