All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.