Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
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Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.