I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
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I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.