Texts From Last Night

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?

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(860): Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out? http://tfl.nu/i8pt

Replies (5) Good night (746) Bad night (4025)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!

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(615): Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY! http://tfl.nu/jz8m

Replies (21) Good night (845) Bad night (4099)
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(512): View more from Texas

last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.

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(512): last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all. http://tfl.nu/2zyx

Replies (11) Good night (3538) Bad night (775)
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(161): View more from

that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.

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(161): that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face. http://tfl.nu/0pd0

Replies (22) Good night (1540) Bad night (3484)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls

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(203): Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls http://tfl.nu/wu3r

Replies (62) Good night (3375) Bad night (1030)
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(513): View more from Ohio

She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.

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(513): She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight. http://tfl.nu/4s7r

Replies (21) Good night (3356) Bad night (649)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.

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(402): Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth. http://tfl.nu/qs80

Replies (10) Good night (3215) Bad night (864)
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(631): View more from New York

Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon

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(631): Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon http://tfl.nu/mdvf

Replies (16) Good night (883) Bad night (4699)
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(318): View more from Louisiana

This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions

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(318): This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions http://tfl.nu/jkxb

Replies (27) Good night (729) Bad night (4043)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick

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(973): I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick http://tfl.nu/xw1l

Replies (41) Good night (1156) Bad night (3748)
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(970): View more from Colorado

you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.

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(970): you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake. http://tfl.nu/y1g9

Replies (18) Good night (986) Bad night (4461)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Come over? It's my birthday

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

How many times has that text failed you tonight?

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(203): Come over? It's my birthday (267): How many times has that text failed you tonight? http://tfl.nu/a6z6

Replies (19) Good night (881) Bad night (7895)
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(925): View more from California

and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.

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(925): and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know. http://tfl.nu/ctra

Replies (21) Good night (4420) Bad night (1237)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles

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(612): I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles http://tfl.nu/ysmu

Replies (19) Good night (1293) Bad night (4996)
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(585): View more from New York

broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.

(716): View more from New York

you're writing country songs now?

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(585): broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me. (716): you're writing country songs now? http://tfl.nu/hdm9

Replies (32) Good night (1775) Bad night (6559)

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