Texts From Last Night

Favorite
(773): View more from Illinois

Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.

(773): View more from Illinois

You spelled "worthless" wrong.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(773): Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note. (773): You spelled "worthless" wrong. http://tfl.nu/nbo3

Replies (67) Good night (1570) Bad night (8603)
Favorite
(302): View more from Delaware

He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(302): He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!" http://tfl.nu/6j56

Replies (34) Good night (1463) Bad night (4757)
Favorite
(774): View more from Massachusetts

I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(774): I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you. http://tfl.nu/weck

Replies (18) Good night (5301) Bad night (933)
Favorite
(312): View more from Illinois

Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(312): Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer. http://tfl.nu/54ng

Replies (19) Good night (8069) Bad night (819)
Favorite
(407): View more from Florida

this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(407): this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god. http://tfl.nu/34d8

Replies (65) Good night (13614) Bad night (814)
Favorite
(216): View more from Ohio

It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(216): It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm. http://tfl.nu/14tt

Replies (23) Good night (3310) Bad night (706)
Favorite
(503): View more from Oregon

like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(503): like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be http://tfl.nu/q4d6

Replies (166) Good night (2092) Bad night (3982)
Favorite
(925): View more from California

2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(925): 2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing. http://tfl.nu/jq9y

Replies (74) Good night (11803) Bad night (1302)
Favorite
(314): View more from Missouri

What happened to the watermelon?

(1-314): View more from Missouri

You fucked it.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(314): What happened to the watermelon? (1-314): You fucked it. http://tfl.nu/pk7c

Replies (15) Good night (2193) Bad night (4499)
Favorite
(260): View more from Indiana

I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.

(260): View more from Indiana

Sorry- wrong number! :)

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(260): I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier. (260): Sorry- wrong number! :) http://tfl.nu/1604

Replies (18) Good night (1509) Bad night (4884)
Favorite
(631): View more from New York

So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(631): So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone http://tfl.nu/mgb2

Replies (40) Good night (1016) Bad night (6739)
Favorite
(440): View more from Ohio

that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(440): that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water... http://tfl.nu/dw5a

Replies (12) Good night (631) Bad night (4119)
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer

(818): View more from California

oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer (818): oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good http://tfl.nu/hoy9

Replies (43) Good night (807) Bad night (4556)
Favorite
(618): View more from Illinois

The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(618): The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass http://tfl.nu/wmly

Replies (412) Good night (26341) Bad night (3580)
Favorite
(516): View more from New York

I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(516): I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn. http://tfl.nu/x6iu

Replies (25) Good night (3772) Bad night (1942)

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: