Texts From Last Night

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(404): View more from Georgia

I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.

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(404): I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home. http://tfl.nu/u6hf

Replies (16) Good night (730) Bad night (3481)
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(650): View more from California

i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.

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(650): i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family. http://tfl.nu/mjvo

Replies (19) Good night (6330) Bad night (643)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter

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(414): fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter http://tfl.nu/kvk4

Replies (15) Good night (1133) Bad night (4552)
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(248): View more from Michigan

so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders

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(248): so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders http://tfl.nu/1b2g

Replies (21) Good night (4458) Bad night (1153)
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(862): View more from New Jersey

so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?

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(862): so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge? http://tfl.nu/lcjy

Replies (10) Good night (792) Bad night (3235)
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(734): View more from Michigan

So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.

(810): View more from Michigan

You're 20.

(734): View more from Michigan

IT'S BUILD A BEAR!

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(734): So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear. (810): You're 20. (734): IT'S BUILD A BEAR! http://tfl.nu/k2jt

Replies (149) Good night (11595) Bad night (2281)
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(415): View more from California

I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny

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(415): I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny http://tfl.nu/icdv

Replies (41) Good night (998) Bad night (4193)
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(541): View more from Oregon

Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.

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(541): Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh. http://tfl.nu/1se4

Replies (72) Good night (6631) Bad night (2042)
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(862): View more from New Jersey

you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"

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(862): you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen" http://tfl.nu/7vz2

Replies (14) Good night (5802) Bad night (799)
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(850): View more from Florida

I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5

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(850): I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5 http://tfl.nu/td44

Replies (58) Good night (772) Bad night (4818)
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(443): View more from Maryland

Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.

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(443): Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality. http://tfl.nu/y8py

Replies (8) Good night (3487) Bad night (811)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake

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(501): he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake http://tfl.nu/mrvl

Replies (21) Good night (4344) Bad night (912)
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(269): View more from Michigan

i think the cat found all the blow we lost...

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(269): i think the cat found all the blow we lost... http://tfl.nu/uqm6

Replies (31) Good night (1532) Bad night (5677)
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(419): View more from Ohio

You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....

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(419): You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean..... http://tfl.nu/ti18

Replies (14) Good night (4882) Bad night (803)
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(509): View more from Washington

im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.

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(509): im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating. http://tfl.nu/g1sz

Replies (16) Good night (3921) Bad night (949)

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