Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..