If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Send us your Text From Last Night!
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.