Texts From Last Night

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(330): View more from Ohio

All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.

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(815): View more from Illinois

Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas

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(217): View more from Illinois

I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...

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(561): View more from Florida

He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.

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25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.

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(816): View more from Missouri

She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it

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(909): View more from California

My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.

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