you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Send us your Text From Last Night!
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister