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    (+49): View more from Germany

    i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.

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    Replies (7) Good night (2868) Bad night (622)
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    (319): View more from Iowa

    Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts

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    Replies (51) Good night (4944) Bad night (820) Order T-Shirt
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    (678): View more from Georgia

    Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you

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    Replies (5) Good night (531) Bad night (2851) Order T-Shirt
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    (808): View more from Hawaii

    how do you spell 'special'? like slow?

    (210): View more from Texas

    S P E L L C H E C K

    (808): View more from Hawaii

    No you dumbass thats not right

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    Replies (14) Good night (3143) Bad night (779)
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    (301): View more from Maryland

    Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night

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    Replies (45) Good night (3511) Bad night (659) Order T-Shirt
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    (504): View more from Louisiana

    i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there

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    Replies (4) Good night (1913) Bad night (442) Order T-Shirt
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    (352): View more from Florida

    New low: just hacked my moms facebook

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    Replies (18) Good night (645) Bad night (2438) Order T-Shirt
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    (650): View more from California

    im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt

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    Replies (35) Good night (489) Bad night (4319) Order T-Shirt
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    (330): View more from Ohio

    Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin

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    Replies (1) Good night (1965) Bad night (420) Order T-Shirt
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    (401): View more from Rhode Island

    My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.

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    Replies (17) Good night (2330) Bad night (526) Order T-Shirt
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    (804): View more from Virginia

    my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.

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    Replies (18) Good night (4504) Bad night (491) Order T-Shirt
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    (407): View more from Florida

    so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all

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    Replies (14) Good night (529) Bad night (2291) Order T-Shirt
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    (+02): View more from

    Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies

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    Replies (15) Good night (2603) Bad night (408) Order T-Shirt
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    (301): View more from Maryland

    Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.

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    Replies (25) Good night (3248) Bad night (492) Order T-Shirt
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    (239): View more from Florida

    and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.

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    Replies (5) Good night (501) Bad night (1828) Order T-Shirt
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  • (859): The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow http://t.co/sQOeFAaf
  • (270): him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
  • (627): The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
  • (402): Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
  • (724): A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
  • (303): Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.

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