i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Randomize