I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
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A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.