Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..