I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?