I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate