Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
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I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
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I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I love black thongs
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying