AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
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Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
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I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.