I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
worst night to have a conscience