At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
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No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
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I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
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Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.