I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing