I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.