A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case