My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even know how to be here
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.