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I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
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