Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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