Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
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Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
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