okay pat passed out under dana's car
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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