are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
