$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
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