Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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