Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Randomize
