maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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