lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
