We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
you mean i was at the winter classic?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize