Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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