what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Randomize
