I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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