Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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