i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
